Look at me, what do you see?
Ebony hair and mahogany eyes. Plump lips and sharp features.
Can you tell that I’m nervous? Unsure of my place.
You see snobbery but I feel shy.
I avert my eyes because your gaze overwhelms me. I don’t know what you’re seeing. I know it isn’t me.
Privacy is my game, and a virtue I cherish. It’s not secrecy I desire, it’s solitude. The introverted girl inside me knows her voice is lost in the chaos. I crave connections that can not be fostered under spectator eyes.
I withdraw into my shell and reveal to those who too seek solace.
Don’t you understand?
You call reservation, arrogance.
You think I don’t know that you whisper my name and pile on the filth? You think I can’t feel the stares, the disapproving nods, the nudges and the winks? Your judgement was set to destroy me, and for what?
Harmless. You really think?
Well, here’s my voice.
I don’t live my life to please you. I don’t walk for your approval.
I don’t smile for your eyes, or laugh for your ears.
My purpose and journey is beyond your reach, just as yours is beyond mine.
I don’t know the roads you’ve walked or the mistakes you’ve made. I don’t know where you’ve been or how far you’ll go. I don’t begrudge you your happiness nor should you mine.
I can’t tell you how to see me, that ship has long sailed. But remember this, what you say speaks volumes.
What do you see and what does that say about you?
Kindness is free but wisdom is freeing.